Reflection

What am I doing?
Leaving my kids for 4-6 hours a day, 3-5 days a week and hardly seeing my husband, especially during the week.
Why?
To bring home the one thing I wish we could live without.
But, wishes are just that, wishes.
My husband’s wage doesn’t cover our bills. Period. So, there really isn’t a question of me working or not, is there?
And, yet, there is….because I don’t want to be a working mom. I don’t. I never have, ever. Never ever.
I hate the thought of it. I don’t judge other moms for working; I just don’t want to be one of them.
And yet, I am required to.
Why?
Because of monetary commitments we have made.
Also because we don’t like having to scrimp to the point of not being able to be generous. We prefer generosity, and we want to be generous to our children, our family, our friends and strangers, even ourselves, every one around us; therefore I have to be and do something I hate.
Is it worth it?
I don’t know. I guess only time will tell.
I pray I’m doing the right thing, making the right decision, and oh, dear God, show me if I am not.